It was a quiet, peaceful day in the lil ol town of Nothing Bad Ever Happens Here. Or Notbad, as the citizens often called it. They were too busy enjoying their idyllic lives to utter such a mouthful. But sometimes evil can seep into even the most perfect of places.

It all started when Mailman Jones was out for his daily mail run.

"Top of the mornin' to ya, Jonesy my good man!" Mrs. Johnson chirped out from her porch, where she rocked back and forth on her chair, peacefully knitting away with her dog Rufus happily panting at her side.

"And a fine mornin' to you as well, ma'am! Looks like you're quite the popular gal today!" Mailman Jones tipped his hat and grinned as he personally handed Mrs. Johnson's mail over.

"Oh, stop it!" Mrs. Johnson giggled as she waved dismissively. "Probably just more junk, unless my lousy son finally decided to write me!"

She looked up at Mailman Jones, expecting some kind of clever quip. But he seemed to be at a loss of words, which probably had something to do with the pistol aimed squarely at his dome.

BANG

The mailman's brain matter splattered all over Mrs. Johnson's face as the killer quickly fled the scene.

"JONESY! JONESY NO!!!" she screamed as she cradled Jonesy's lifeless, brainless husk. Her demeanor soon flipped from terror to an eerie calm, however, as she narrowed her eyes and gazed out at the horizon. She then turned to Rufus.

"Three centuries I've lived here. Three centuries. I've seen babies born. I've seen good men and women die. I've seen it prosper. I've seen it crumble. I was here when it was erected, and I will be here when it draws its last breath. And I know this: there is only one type of evil who could've done this. Only one."

Her hand slowly curled into a fist.

"The mafia. They've returned."

It is now Day 1. The day will end in 24 hours, or when a majority is reached. With 26 alive, it'll take 14 to reach majority.

lynch count
Henry (2/14) - Jamie, Lamps
Zach (1/14) - Seb
Mittens (1/14) - SilverKeith

21 hours remaining

itsbrianyay @ 26/6/2018 5:47

Boc you AMATEUR WHERE IS THE COLOR How am I supposed to know if there are new posts??? Surely you don't expect me to click

HUGEEE diff

lynch count
Mittens (3/14) - SilverKeith, Primate, Ahoda, DR
Curtis (2/14) - Mittens, Badger
Henry (2/14) - Jamie, Lamps
Jamie (2/14) - Henry, JJ
JJ (2/14) - Brainbomb, Primate
Zach (1/14) - Seb, Badger
Christian (1/14) - Josh
Primate (0/14) - Ahoda
Vlady (0/14) - Primate

2 hours remaining

lynch count
Mittens (3/14) - SilverKeith, Primate, Ahoda, DR, Vlady
Henry (3/14) - Jamie, Lamps, SilverKeith
Curtis (2/14) - Mittens, Badger
Jamie (2/14) - Henry, JJ
JJ (2/14) - Brainbomb, Primate
Lamps (1/14) - Josh, SilverKeith
Zach (1/14) - Seb, Badger
Primate (1/14) - Ahoda, Brainbomb
Christian (0/14) - Josh
Vlady (0/14) - Primate

~40 minutes remaining

lynch count
Henry (3/14) - Jamie, Lamps, SilverKeith, Zach, Josh
Mittens (3/14) - SilverKeith, Primate, Ahoda, DR, Vlady
Merc (2/14) - SilverKeith, Jamie
Curtis (2/14) - Mittens, Badger
Zach (2/14) - Seb, Badger, Curtis
JJ (2/14) - Brainbomb, Primate
Jamie (1/14) - Henry, JJ
SilverKeith (1/14) - Merc
Primate (1/14) - Ahoda, Brainbomb
Lamps (0/14) - Josh, SilverKeith
Christian (0/14) - Josh
Vlady (0/14) - Primate

~10 minutes remaining

final count
Henry (5/14) - Jamie, Lamps, SilverKeith, Zach, Josh, SilverKeith, Jamie
Mittens (4/14) - SilverKeith, Primate, Ahoda, DR, Vlady, Merc
Curtis (2/14) - Mittens, Badger
Zach (2/14) - Seb, Badger, Curtis
JJ (2/14) - Brainbomb, Primate
Primate (2/14) - Ahoda, Brainbomb, JJ
Merc (1/14) - SilverKeith, Jamie, Christian
Jamie (1/14) - Henry, JJ
Lamps (0/14) - Josh, SilverKeith
SilverKeith (0/14) - Merc
Christian (0/14) - Josh
Vlady (0/14) - Primate

Henry jaunted down the street with a wide grin on his face. He had just completed another hard day's work, had run his errands, and was ready to go home to his expecting wife.

"troublemaker #2.....you're gonna love these!" he said as he looked down into his bag which contained a cornucopia of baby items: rattler, blanket, bottle, and...

Henry furrowed his brow and rummaged around his bag. Something was missing.

"my breast pump....where is it?! srslyish!"

He looked up and was greeted with a double bird.



"brrrr...your lifeless body hanging from the neck will be the 1st step to bring righteousness upon notbad!" Henry spat.

Jamie slyly produced a breast pump from behind his back and held it out menacingly, while Lamps, Zach, Josh, and SilverKeith violently wrestled Henry to the ground.

"my fellow citizens of notbad, first jonesy and now me? NUH-UH!" Henry cried out, to no avail.

Jamie proceeded to attach one pump to his mouth and one to his eye, and began to pump. Henry screamed a muffled scream as both his eye and his oxygen reserves began to get sucked up his fancy breast pump.

He soon went silent and limp, as his attackers callously threw his lifeless corpse to the middle of the road and walked off into the sunset.

Spoiler

+

Henry, TOWN (Medela Pump In Style Advanced Breast Pump Backpack), has been lynched. Once during the game, you may use your breast pump to produce a fresh glass of milk. You can either produce your own milk or steal someone else's. If you steal someone else's milk, you will receive their ability x2 (e.g. if you were to steal a doctor's milk, you will be able to protect two people a night). However, if you choose scum, you will die. If you choose to drink your own milk, you will receive an undisclosed* ability. * You will drop dead at the end of the next day. However, you may choose one person to take down with you.

It is now Night 1. The day will end at 9 EST tomorrow (about 22 hours from now). Submit your actions (or non-actions) now.