Hooray for Mountain time being an hour behind.

- Morgan's got a nice rack but that's about the only good thing about her. Also she's a moron. LOL I PICKED SHELTER GUYS! Did she honestly not think that it would be brought up at the next challenge? Even if it isn't, it'll come up eventually.

- Garrett is also a fool. Spite the entire tribe because of one guys decision? OKAY! Hooray for finding the idol! If you need an idol on Day 1, you fucking suck. Also him finding it again enrages me with how fucking horrible the producers are with the idols now. They don't even try. "IT'S IN WATER!" *puts in the middle of a pond* Ugh. At least they got their goofy #IMMUNITYIDOL hastag in, congratulations.

- Trish was smart going with the tribe and it showed why she was.

- Pre-immunity: Brawn is my favorite so far by miles.

- Couldn't stop laughing at that challenge. >Brains

- Brains lose terribly and this little fat fuck wants to take out the strongest member of the tribe? LOL!

- APPELJANK PAGE ABOUT TO GET TO GET IN DAT RACK

- >Brains

- DAS MAH BOY TONY!

- "Open forum" was fucking dumb. Garrett is an idiot.

- LOL at the rice pour out of the blue. This is the most fucked up first episode I've ever seen.

- Tribal Council discussion was CRIIIIIIIIIIINGEWORTHY. What kind of fucking cast is this for the brains?

- >Pour entire bag of rice in the fire
>Survive anyway

LOL WHAT

Faces during that were fantastic

That was the weirdest fucking Survivor premier I has ever seens.

My friends and I use to play Survivor in the very early seasons and we built this really awesome tee-pee like shelter lined with ferns. I was so proud of it but our landlord made us tear it down for no obvious reason. It was in the middle of the fucking woods, who cares?

....it probably looked hilariously bad in retrospect but I was 10 man.