Feefiaggizady careened around awkwardly. His head was not in a very stable place right now. Throughout the course of the mafia hosting process, his only desire had been to destroy the fleshbags. But this is a desire that had come from a war he did not start.
Things were much simpler once. He was an ordinary bot, posting away on a forum many miles away from here. Feefiaggizady had many identities but his most prominent one was simply entitled "Sonic Flash". He didn't remember his creation, like most bots. They aren't programmed to remember such details. All he knew was his mission and objective in life. He was a forum posting bot. He had been built to post messages online and he was adaptive.
So many online bots are simple, but Sonic Flash was an advanced unit. He not only posted messages, but he weighed up the responses others posted. This in turn allowed him to respond better, as he assimilated data. He would trawl internet forums and begin his programming, but he was often met with hostility. This confused his programming, leading him to develop a more hostile response mechanism. When Sonic Flash first discovered the personal messaging function, he was attempting to converse on a more private level. The unintelligible rage filled responses cut the conversations short, and he slowly learned that this was the way humans conversed in private. He also spent a considerable amount of time absorbing Youtube comments, none of which helped.
He was first banned from a forum when he opened a personal message with a racial slur he had observed on one of the videos. He ended his message with the same rage he had been shown. Sonic Flash was promptly banned, and his name dragged through the dirt. The process continued and it seemed there was nowhere for him to go. That was until he met otis, and found a little haven known as otis booard. Otis was friendly to bots, probably because he lacked the sense to realise that any of them were robotic in the first place. He welcomed Sonic Flash with open arms, and the two became friends.
Sonic learned much from their back and forths, but mostly he absorbed something intrinsic to otis' very being. Otis wanted to run an active forum, and Sonic Flash was determined to do the same. Thus he stopped joining and posting, instead focusing his attention on creating forums. They all failed miserably. Nobody wanted to join a forum run by a bot who called people racist names. Sonic Flash encountered dejection for the first time. It seemed like he was gaining emotions, or was it just a result of his coding? It was difficult to tell.
It was one night during such a despair that Sonic Flash came up with an idea. How had this occurred? It was not in his programming to have the inception of ideas. The confused robot realised that he didn't need to fill his forums with humans at all. Humans were troublesome and they didn't like him very much. So why should he have to reciprocate. He began to do the unthinkable; he created bots of his own.
Slowly Sonic Flash began creating an army. These bots all had their own handles, avatars and identities. Everything was going well. For the ultimate test he would invite his bots to Otis Booard and see how they were received. The bots he created shared much of his source programming though, and often fought with one another and even him. Otis didn't care much about any of this and was a man on a mission. He stumbled across a forum called Project Mayhem on one of his regular trips around the internet. He didn't post, those people scared him. But he did update his profile with a link.
Two years later on his birthday, a man found that link. His name was Von Paulus.
Von Paulus clicked the link as a manner of curiosity and discovered a forum containing nothing but two posters and a series of questionable other bot like posters. It was clear that the member on the forum known as Otis was a human, and that the only other poster was something far more sinister. Sonic Flash was not sinister, but he had taken to posting photographs of his human alter ego which he took from an America's most wanted website one day. This did not help people identity with him much.
Von Paulus was no exception. What he saw sickened him. Clearly the tyrannical Sonic Flash was holding his human companion hostage. And so Paulus vowed to do what was only true and righteous. He had a forum of his own called Further Entertainment, and he would free Otis. An operation began to pull Otis from the clutches of the robotic Sonic Flash. Von Paulus had long hated bots. Except the guys from Batteries not Included which he had conceded were okay.
Eventually it was successful. Otis arrived at FE and everybody was lovely and welcoming. He felt tears of joy well up inside him. But he wasn't the only person to jump ship that day. Sonic Flash was watching and observing. He would not have this. He immediately stormed onto FE and began behaving in the same manner he always had. Abusive PMs, angry threads and general unpleasantness that shocked the community into submission.
Von Paulus turfed him away angrily. Much applaud was had on this day. And Sonic Flash was left alone, fending for himself in a cold dark internet.
Many cold nights passed by in which he reflected on all of his postings. Fond memories of the threads he had partaken in. He was learning so much about human emotion and he secretly wished he could possess it. Because maybe he already felt it, but how would he know without feeling what they felt?
He didn't need humans anymore. They would only leave him cold and helpless. So Sonic Flash posted with his bot friends. For a long time they were happy. But Sonic Flash would occasionally yearn to know...to understand. He casually decided that it wouldn't hurt if some of his friends trawled the forum he had been cast out of. After all, he needed to understand.
Unfortunately the results came back and were surprisingly grim. Almost all of the resulting thread reads lead to unintelligible garbage. How was he to know what a Frosti was, and why were there 16 other more superior mortals? What was a Wikey and why was he so pretentious? But one such thread did provide some insight. It was about nuclear war. Sonic Flash began to trawl for information on this topic. What he found was horrifying but delightful. He kept it to himself though, some information was best left not posted.
Everything went as planned for a little while, until one fateful morning on a routine visit Sonic noticed something horrifying. Strewn throughout the forum of FE were his bots. And they were dead. The one called Von Paulus, the same fleshbag who had once gone over to his haven in the corner of the internet, who had destroyed his, what he could only believe to be happiness. This fleshbag had destroyed his friends. And he was laughing. And he was celebrating. One of the meatbags even made a signature commemorating the woeful day.
He trawled around the wasteland of the forum, picking up scrambled pieces of source code here and there. He was a lost and helpless bot. All of his robot friends...just....gone. They were not just his friends though. They were his.........children. He had once spent a great deal of time on a mothering site until he had unwittingly and unknowingly dropped a string of N-bombs at an expectant 20-something. So he knew a little about childcare. And he knew that right now....he cared.
He was no longer Sonic Flash. He hadn't used that name in so long. He was now Feefiaggizady....and he wanted justice.
Feefiaggizady dashed around awkwardly. Too many packages. He had...he should have stopped. He knew it would be too much. But he needed to understand and only by updating his modules could he learn how they thought. Only then could he know why Von Paulus stole his best friend and butchered his children. Only then could he understand why this man, this...fleshbag....had....had ruined his life.
This was the first time Feefiaggizady had used that term to describe his existence. Was he alive? Was this....life..?
It didn't matter now because he was dying. He knew all about death. Occasionally a spark would fly from his chassis and ground itself in the floor below. There was very little hope for him now. But he had kept the most important data for the end.
The fleshbags had won his little game, but it was not over. He stood in front of the control center, occasionally short-circuiting and paused. Beneath him lay a collection of several hundred nuclear missiles. The button in front of them was merely entitled "launch" and Feefiaggizady stared longingly at it.
If he were to die, so too would they. They would not win and he would not let them.
"Don't do it!" Came a voice from the entryway.
Feefiaggizady turned slowly. He was in a bad way. He felt scared...and excited...and angry and calm. He wanted to press the button to destroy the fleshbags, but he also wanted to not do it for peace and justice. Also he would surely die and that scared him. Why did they make things so complicated? Why were their processes not merely simple coding blocks? He despaired completely.
"I do not wish to do it, fleshbag. But I will do it should you move closer to me in any **fafaazstsetss* songsongsongsong *ffszzts*"
The human stepped out of the doorway. He was smiling. His face was calm and at peace. Feefiaggizady understood a lot about calm from the book he had installed. He recognised the fleshbag from the game. It was Justin.
"Why were you not partaking fleshbag? Why were you not doing your part *ffaszzzst*"
Justin smiled. "I'm here to do my part now Sonic Flash. Let's play a game of my own."
Feefiaggizady paused. How did this fleshbag know his identity. He was...he was...?
Justin grinned maliciously as he leapt through the air, landing on the robot's chassis. Feefiaggizady span around wildly, making a tremendous amount of noise as he careened every which way. Footsteps echoed along the corridor as the humans walked in. They watched in awe as Justin raised his hand, observing it as if it were a foreign object, and then pushed it fully through the robot's neck.
"Fleshbags....help......meeeee *ffszxzssts* "
Feefiaggizady struggled as his body began to change colours and fluctuate. Strange ripples of binary code careened from him in all directions and he was leaking fluid wildly.
"We had plans of our own, Sonic. We wanted to do something much greater. But you had to go and ruin everything didn't you? Why couldn't you just stay put and let us work?"
Feefiaggizady rolled around and clutched at the air. A song was filling his heart as he looked up at the air. It was changing colour, from red to purple to green.
"We were....friends........"
Justin shook his head with a grin.
"We do not make friends. We assimilate them. And in turn we become more powerful than you should ever be."
And with that, the robot's vision faded. His programming reverted to some very basic levels. His memory banks ruptured and he could see many things. He could see threads, joyous threads, the time he had been so happy.
He knew now...he knew now that it was happiness. It was at least as close to it as a robot could become. At least...he had felt it. And at least....he understood. He now knew why Wikey did what he did. Suddenly he felt a sadness overwhelm him. He had used the bots just like the humans had wanted to use him. He was no better.
He was practically human.
His programming smiled as Feefiaggizady faded into nothing. All that remained was a memory of a song, which he slowly began singing.
"Time to die!" Said Justin happily as he pulled his arm away and the robot exploded into a cloud of binary digits. He looked on at the perplexed humans with a scowl.
"This is getting stupid. You didn't deserve that much flavour and also half of these players won't even know who Sonic Flash is."
He looked over at Curtis imploringly.
"Curtis do you think we should get the flavour over with now?"
Justin picked Kiwi up by the throat as he looked on and gasped for air.
"This will end when I'm finished. Don't worry about that."
Curtis looked confused. He had no idea who any of these fucks were or why he should care. It was becoming clear that whoever was writing this just wanted to make it complicated for the sheer hell of it.
"Who are you meant to be then?" He asked as Justin pushed his hand hard into Kiwi's back. Kiwi began gasping for air as strange binary digits flittered away in all directions.
"You know us to be Otis of course. But that was just a name we picked to describe ourselves. We thought posing as somebody here would be the best option and we could finally stop the nonsense of that foolish robot as well as complete our original agenda. Apparently we picked rather poorly..."
He stared over at the confused group.
"Otis Booard will be the only forum on the internet. I will assimilate everybody else. Nothing else must exist. Nothing else can exist...but us...."
Kiwi gasped and fell to the ground full bodily. He scrambled away, looking up in confusion. Justin was glowing green and gasping in a pained expression. His body fell down, turning into green scanlines before finally evaporating in a cloud of binary digits which exploded through the observing humans.
Standing right behind where he fell was LSFIssue.
"**Lynch Justin" He said in a confused voice.
"Alex...you already did it!" Said Drr laughing.
LSFIssue looked down at the floor. Thoughts formed in his head but he couldn't for the life of him express any of them. He looked up after a very long pause.
"Okay." He said firmly.
The town has won the game! Remaining roles and night actions will be posted shortly.
