I'm in a melancholic funk tonight (I've been having a very difficult year). Been trailblazing through a lot of sad songs because there's something cathartic about releasing pent up emotion. There were a few stirrings with some earlier tracks but this finally got me good.
I remember during my senior year in High School, my English teacher (someone who I was insanely fond of) died after a long battle with cancer. He had such a bright personality, always had room for kindness and wisdom to share, he was also an amazing photographer, and always made pictures of the culture in Africa, and did a whole bunch of chariety work. He really, really cared for his students. Me and him could talk hours upon hours about a whole variety of stuff, he always knew how to keep the conversation flowing in a pleasent way.
The last time I saw him was during prom (he was the photographer), and I just wish I would have spent more time with him, as he died a couple days afterwards. I was devasted when I found out. During his cremation, I was an emotional wreck. His family members were speaking about him - and all the stories they told were so inspirational and sounded so much like him.
Funny thing was, that his name was Hans Maatje (Maatje literally means 'Buddy' in Dutch.), it always gave me comfort in reminding myself that he was seriously such a good 'buddy' to me when I had a hard time fitting in during my freshmen year. He seriously helped me become into the person I am today.
But anyways, during the cremation, there was a song that played before we said our final goodbye (When you could walk past the coffin before it went into the oven), and I remember standing infront of it (one of my friends, who wasn't as affected, but still had to cry because of how sad I was, held my hand at that moment), it was super sad because you were literally standing there, knowing that he was really gone, and that that'd be the last time you'd ever see anything of him again. I slightly touched the coffin, before turning around. I was seriously so, so, so sad. And I'm usually never really sad about stuff, but he really meant so much to me.
The following days were the first few days of summer break, and I wanted to read 'A Feast for Crows' in one sitting, but decided instead to actually (maybe even stupidly), listen to all the songs that played, and speak about memories of him with my friends. I was destroying myself with grief, but at the same time it was insanely cathartic like you said.
Still makes me light-headed when I think about that time.
But anyways, here were the songs that were playing:
What makes matters even sadder was that he chose those songs to be played before he died. He wrote down a list of 5 songs (those 2 were the most emotionally stirring for me). Just thinking about how he chose those songs before the fatal day, himself knowing he was going to die. It must have been extremely emotional!
He always said he was never afraid of death. He was truly one of a kind. Extremely unique view of the world, can't say I have ever met anyone else like him. He was like a father to me, and it sucks that I took those last few moments for granted. But I just remembered all the talks we had before-hand, and it's comforting to think back on that when thinking 'what else could I have done'.
I dunno, the entire grieving process is a mental maze with each turn being another blow to the heart.
I hope you are doing okay though, if you ever need to speak about it don't be afraid to contact me. It was relatively helpful speaking to people when meneer Maatje died, maybe it's the same way for you. :)
Omg, thanks for this! Haha, when I was younger I one time (Actually many times) watched the Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake trailer, and loved the song that was playing. Before I knew how to logically search up songs (Writing in lyrics in google, or simply asking on /r/tipofmytongue what the title was) I tried many ways to find out what the song was called, and never quite could, haha. So this makes me happy considering I hadn't thought about the song for quite some time now! :)
I had the Cure Unplugged set I'd recorded on VHS when it first aired in 1991. I always knew there were additional tracks recorded that never made it to the show, since the credits played over the opening to "If Only Tonight We Could Sleep" but ended long before the song got to the vocals. Just recently I had a friend who said his daughter's favorite Cure song was "Boys Don't Cry", so I had to search up the Unplugged version of the song which is melancholy where the original is bouncy. And I finally came upon the "missing" tracks from the original show. "A Letter To Elise" would be released in 1992 on the album Wish; I had no idea they had recorded this on Unplugged in an early form with alternate lyrics. Still a great version, though I do think the cleaned up lyrics on the album version are more powerful.
Below I'm also including the original "televised" set, as well as a few tracks that also didn't make it onto the show.
"Let's Go To Bed" from Japanese Whispers
"Just Like Heaven" from Kiss Me Kiss Me Kiss Me
"The Caterpillar" from The Top
"The Blood" from The Head on the Door
"Boys Don't Cry" from Boys Don't Cry/Three Imaginary Boys
"The Walk" (with kazoo accompaniment) from Japanese Whispers
Credits beginning of "If Only Tonight We Could Sleep" from Kiss Me Kiss Me Kiss Me
"Lullaby" from Disintegration
"If Only Tonight We Could Sleep" from Kiss Me Kiss Me Kiss Me
My understanding is that the following were also recorded, but I have yet to find any version recorded of them:
"M" from Seventeen Seconds
"In Your House" from Seventeen Seconds
"Time Has Told Me" (Nick Drake cover)
How can you have any pudding if you won't eat your meat?
Omg, thanks for this! Haha, when I was younger I one time (Actually many times) watched the Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake trailer, and loved the song that was playing. Before I knew how to logically search up songs (Writing in lyrics in google, or simply asking on /r/tipofmytongue what the title was) I tried many ways to find out what the song was called, and never quite could, haha. So this makes me happy considering I hadn't thought about the song for quite some time now! :)
Yeah, This Mortal Coil was a side-project of record label 4AD's artists- this particular track is essentially the Cocteau Twins. Three albums were put out originally (and I think they wanted to make another more recently, but I haven't been paying attention). But it features mix ups of some of the other 4AD bands (including Dead Can Dance and Cindytalk and the like) and usually has a lot of depressing covers, though their cover of Talking Heads "Drugs" is awesome.
How can you have any pudding if you won't eat your meat?
idk if anyone listens to hiphop on here but Schoolboy Q's latest album is hands down the best hip hop album of the year. Shit's fire and it's on spotify :crazy:
gonna do a ranking for the 1/2way point of albums that came out this year
#1 GOAT
