Give us their names

Curtis

Curtis and 2 others.

Their names are Josh and Boc.

I suppose it's partly my fault for not any posting reminders in here. :P

I'm posting the stories I have later tonight. If the others are in by then, I'll post them as well.

If they are not, you will have greatly disappointed me...






























:P

but for real, yo.

An SUV screeched to a halt at the end of a gravel infested road, right next to an army of trees and nature. The driver and his co-driver exited the car, the driver smiled triumphantly to himself as he exited the vehicle.

"We made it." Alex Roles, a clean-shaven and cocky son of a bitch with a big chin, said out loud victoriously. He was clad in country clothes, with a cowboy hat on top, some leather boots and a belt buckle with a sign that said dangerous.

"I thought we would never make it." Dexter Otterson said, trying to regain a sense of calm. He was clad in a regular business suit, soaked in sweat. He was wearing tennis shoes and wore a pair of glasses.

The two of them looked at the sign in front of them, Yellowstone National Park. Dozens of other cars had also been parked in the same area.

"Seems like we got some company." Alex said with a fat look on his face. He turned to Dexter. "You got the map?"

"I've got it right here." Dexter said, picking up a map of Yellowstone with the letter X marked somewhere in the middle. Alex leaned over to take a look at Dexter's map.

"Alright then, let's go." He decided.

The two of them began their journey and after four hours of trekking, they finally reached some sort of cave with the letter X spray painted on the ground right in front of the entrance.

"Well, it looks like we found it." Alex said.

"After you." Dexter gestured, handing him a flashlight.

"After me it is." Alex said confidently as he snatched the flashlight from Dexter's hand, only to head into the cave. Dexter followed.

As Dexter follows Alex into the unknown, his mind takes him back exactly a day. He found himself in the middle of New York, a lively, chaotic city brimming with life. He suddenly noticed a grafitti artist out of the corner of his eye, and watched him spray paint a mischievous big X on the side of a building. The man looked around and ran off as soon as he finished. Dexter shrugged and continued, eventually reaching a bus stop. He picked up his phone and checked the time. Seems like the bus would be here in five minutes. As he was standing there waiting, he scrolled through his Facebook feed and found a legitimate news story about the polar ice caps and global warming.





He scrolled down until he found some images of the North Pole. The climate scientists had painted the letter X in big red letters across the entire North Pole. According to the article, if they couldn't protect the North Pole from the global warming, the magnetic field would collapse and bring forth catastrophic world ending events. Protecting the marked territory was now a top priority among lead scientists and experts, according to the article.

The bus soon arrived, only for Dexter to jump aboard. As he sat down, he found hundreds of X letters scribbled on the back of the seat in front of him. Apparently, someone's been having too much free time. The X's slowly started to remind Dexter of his ex girlfriend Xyla.

His phone suddenly starts ringing, he looked down, and to his surprise, he saw that it was his ex Xyla's number.

"Xyla?" He answered.

"Nah man. It's me, Alex." Someone else answered instead.

"Who are you?" Dexter asked, confused. "What happened to Xyla? Why do you have her phone?"

"Listen man, we ain't got time for that, Xyla's in danger. She just left me with this map, telling me she wanted to find the City of Synchrons or something."

"Tell me who you are already!" Dexter shouted into the phone, turning some heads on the bus.

"I'm Xyla's boyfriend!"

Dexter's mind takes him back to the cave, with Alex leading the way with the flashlight.

"Hey Dexter, look at this." Alex said as he pointed the flashlight towards a wall inside the cave. Dexter walked over and inspected the three things painted on the wall. The first, a spherical drawing with a white X drawn inside, then four more X's drawn over, under, and right and left of it. Then, a humanoid pig like thing with a spear in its hands, with an X crossed over it. And finally, the third thing painted looked like an ancient city. The word Synchroni written underneath, with an X crossed over it.

"This is some fascinating stuff." Dexter said, trying to count all the X's. "Let me snap some pictures." He picked up his phone and started to snap some pictures.

"Xyla...?" Alex suddenly asked, noticing something moving around in the corner of the cave.

"Hey, would you look at that." Alex said, tipping his cowboy hat sideways, pointing the flashlight towards a big furry thing sleeping in the corner of the cave.

"Oh jesus." Dexter exclaimed quietly, with horror painted on his face, as the two of them finds a hibernating bear sleeping right next to them.

"Don't worry, it's sleeping." Alex told Dexter with a reassuring voice, waving the flashlight around. This made the bear wake up, and with one bite, the bear bit Alex's head straight off. Dexter cries out in horror, snapping pictures of the bear with his phone, only for a paw to strike him down. Dexter cried out in horror once more, as the bear finished him off.

Two humanoid pig like creatures clad in hazmat suits, watched the thing on a screen in a laboratory. The first pig picked up a remote and turned off the channel, only for the second pig to cross out Dexter and Alex's names out with X's. War Pigs, as they were also known as, put their human face masks on and headed outside, to continue the important work they were doing at the North Pole.






Title submitted by: Curtis

Three things to be included: a hibernating bear, War Pigs, The North Pole
(submitted by Boc)

"I wouldn't believe it if I wasn't seeing it," Detective Randall Cravendoff said as he surveyed the body lying on the floor inside the lobby of the Museum of Flags. The flag of the Hometown Hooligans, apparently the man's favourite sportsball team had been draped over his face. "But clearly, this man's nipples have exploded."

Cravendoff's assistant, Dottie, took everything in as she snapped a few photos of the scene.

"Do you think exploding nipples was the cause of death?" she asked.

The detective cleared his throat.

"That is to be determined, but I'd say it's likely."

"How do one's nipples even explode?" she asked.

"That is the question," he replied. "How, indeed."




Morlin Doodlebower grabbed his Hometown Hooligans flag on the way out the door. He couldn't wait to proudly show off his love for his favourite sportsball team while also checking out an entire museum of other flags.

He stuck his thumb out to hail a cab. As he did, he felt something bite his hand. But when he looked, there was nothing there. No sign of a bite mark either. Must have imagined it, he thought, as he climbed into the cab that stopped for him. He told the driver where he was headed and they were on their way.




Shandy McBuster was just a sparkfly looking for his next meal. As he flew around the city, he noticed a tasty human thumb just sticking out there in the world. Perfect, Shandy thought to himself as he made a flyline for the thumb, landing on the hand it was attached to, and quickly bit down, burrowing right into the skin of the man the hand was attached to.




Morlin exited the cab and entered The Museum of Flags.

“Wow!” he exclaimed. “Look at this place!”

He walked up to the counter in the lobby and requested one admission ticket.

The attendant happily served Morlin.

“Thank you,” he said glancing at the attendant’s name tag. “Loonda.”

As Loonda watched Morlin walk away from her counter, she heard what sounded like an explosion! And then another one! And then she saw Morlin slowly fall to the floor, the Hometown Hooligans flag landing over top his face.

Instead of calling the police, Loonda called a private investigator. Don’t blame her, it was her first day!




Detective Randall Cravendoff and Dottie were still inspecting the body of Mr. Doodlebower, when they noticed a tiny sparkfly exiting from the hole where his right nipple used to be.




Shandy McBuster was trapped inside Morlin Doodlebower. He had only intended a quick bite and a quick tour but got lost and couldn’t find a way out.

He did the only thing he could think of. He charged his little sparkfly body and emitted a tiny blast to try to create an exit. It didn’t work. But unbeknownst to Shandy, the blast was enough for Morlin’s left nipple to pop off. So Shandy charged up again and this time, emitted an even larger blast which happened to pop Morlin’s right nipple off and allowed a tiny bit of light to shine through. But it was enough to signal a way out for Shandy.

As the little sparkfly made its exit, he heard a voice from a large man say “We’re going to want that for evidence,” and the next thing Shandy knew, he was trapped again! but this time inside of a tiny glass container.




Cravenoff and Dottie arrived back at their office but upon entry, Dottie, who was carrying the tiny glass container with the tiny little sparkfly inside of it, tripped over a bit of carpet and the glass container holding Shandy went flying through the air.

Yes! Shandy thought. Freedom at last!

The glass container hit the floor of the office and exploded. Shandy was a little dazed but he was free!

“Oh!” Dottie cried. “Randall, look out!”

But before either of them could realize what was about to happen, Randall Cravendoff’s large shoe landed right on top of the dazed little sparkfly. There was a tiny little crunching sound.

Randall Cravendoff completed the report of his findings.




The detective and his assistant returned to The Museum of Flags to speak with Loonda. They were surprised to learn she had quit. Perhaps the world of flags was too much for Loonda Kittenbundle.

When they returned to their office once again, Randall and Dottie found Loonda waiting outside for them.

“Hi!” she said. “I quit The Museum of Flags. I…want to be just like you two!”




Loonda Kittendbundle showed up for her first day of work at her new job, Cravendoff Investigations. As she hung up her coat, she thought she felt something bite her on her hand. But when she looked nothing was there. Must have imagined it, she thought.




A woman was was walking past the office of Cravendoff Investigations when she heard what sounded like a tiny explosion. And then another. Startled, she stopped in her tracks and that's when something had shot out from the window of the building and landed right at her feet. She stared down at it as she wondered out loud, "Is...that a...nipple?"






Title submitted by: Wikey

Three things to be included: Light, Flag, Hand
(submitted by Josh)

“So what’s my story title?” Vernon asked as he typed away on his macbook.

“Alright the title is ‘Living on a Dream’” Christian messaged back.

“Yaw that’s easy peasy I’ll just describe the dream I had last night here is how it began…” Vernon began.

“Really? Just describing a dream?”

“Shut it. So it all began with me on the ground in a field…”

-----

“Ah!” I yelled as my arm recoiled backward slamming my elbow into the dirt below me.

As I stood I noticed I was in the middle of a wheat field. The crops moist with dew swayed peacefully in the wind.

As I made my way through the field I noticed someone sitting on a pedestal.

“Stargate?” I asked. “What are you doing out here in this field?” I questioned.

“Vernon you ok buddy?” Stargate looked down on me with concern.

“He’s just fine aren’t you Vernon?” A voice called from behind me and I spun around. It was KC.

“KC what is all of this?” I began to ask. I was now in the middle of the Hollywood walk of fame.

“What the..”

“Vernon I’m glad I found you. You are getting your star today!” KC beamed at me. Everyone was staring with wide eyes as we passed.

“Vernon I love you!” Some man yelled out.

“Vernon, have my babies!” A woman yelled.

“Will mod for food.” A bedraggled Curtis whimpered as he walked down the street.

I had a huge smile on my face at that. Here I was the most famous person in Hollywood and Curtis is outside begging for food.

KC looked at me and smiled himself. “Schadenfreude huh?”

“What do you mean?” I asked looking back.

“You’re experiencing schadenfreude.” KC commented.

“I don’t think I have a thing for mother cats that may or may not be dead.” I corrected him.

“No schadenf… you know what, nevermind.” KC dropped the conversation.

That’s when I spotted Kyle running up to me.

“Vernon what is happening?” He sounded scared. “What’s wrong?!”

“No problem here Kyle move along.” KC said, shooing away my friend.

“Uh, what was that about?” I questioned.

“Don’t worry about it Vernon you’re famous.” KC gestured at the empty star..

“S-sure. Yaw that makes sense.” I walk up putting my hands down confidently.

“Wow now this is living.” I say as I go to pull my hands out… but they are stuck.

“What?” I pull with all my might but my hands just go deeper and before I know it I’m completely submerged in the cement and falling.

And I land on the ground. My forehead moist with sweat.

“What the hell was that?” I yell. I notice that I’m at the Oscars.

“What is happening?” I grab a chair to keep from falling over.

“This is a dream Vernon you silly boy.”

“Oh that’s why I’m famous and cool?” I ask.

“Yes you can be anything you want to be here. These are your memories and your fantasies combined.”

There was an empty seat in front of us. KC was in front of him in a sheep costume.

“What’s with the clothes?” I ask.

“I just like being in sheep’s clothing.” He responded.

“I remember these oscars I was a seat filler.” I reminisced.

“But not anymore this seat is for you.” KC gestured to the empty seat.

“Hell yes.” I said, this dream was the best!

But as I sat down to watch the bad movies win a dome was placed on my head.

My friend Perry was suddenly next to me with tears in his eyes. “Vernon you’re scaring me.” KC shooed him away.

“Now for electroconvulsive therapy.” KC said hitting a switch.

Electricity wracked my body as I ripped myself free.


“What the hell was that?” I screamed.

“Nightmare?”

“That’s it I’m waking up.” I said shutting my eyes.

Nothing happened.

“You aren’t asleep.” KC corrected.

“But you said this was a dream.”

“You are stuck in this dream but I never said you were asleep.” KC held up a small metal ball.

My arm recoiled at the sight of it and I began to run as fast as I could.

----

“And you got away I assume?” Christian asked.

“Of course I did.” I said assuredly.

“How exactly? The story is kind of incomplete.” Christian pressed now.

“Well I ran and I got home and…” The details were foggy.

“And then what?” He asked.

“Well I got on my computer and you gave me a story prompt and I…” Vernon shook his head… this already happened.

“You shouldn’t have touched that ball.” Christian said.

“But I didn’t I-” I stopped as I noticed KC’s shadow looming over me.

“Maybe start from the beginning.” KC said with a smirk his fangs now showing.

“I-”

----

“How did you get me into this.” Stargate said as they moved through the old abandoned building.

“It’s urban exploration, lameo.” I said.

“It’s just old, yawn.” Kyle added.

“I think it’s cool.” Perry chimed in.

As we made our way into a dusty room there sat a metal ball on a pedestal.

“Ooh shiny.” I said as I reached for it.

“Careful dude.” Perry warned.

As my fingers touched it I felt a jolt and my arm recoiled violently against the wall. Ball still in hand.

I stopped being myself in that moment.

“Vernon you ok buddy?” Stargate looked down with concern.

Vernon stood with a twisted grin as he ran at stargate touching him with the ball. He similarly recoiled and lowered his head.

“Vernon what is happening?” Kyle said, sounding scared. “What’s wrong?!”

The twisted smile Vernon quickly moved to him as well, silencing him.

Perry stood next to him with tears in his eyes. “Vernon you’re scaring me.”

But just as soon as he spoke he was also taken.

Vernon with the twisted smile looked around at his old corrupted friends.

“Hey guys, now that those fools are in dreamland… let’s say we have a little FE reunion.”






Title submitted by: Boc

Three things to be included: Instance of schadenfreude, Use of the word "moist" more than once, Electroconvulsive therapy
(submitted by Ry)

"LISTEN UP YOU SONS OF BITCHES" Colonel Swordfish started. "For 50 long years now we have waged a shadow war against the Giant Psychic Lobsters that live beneath the sea...50 long years now we have tried to rid ourselves of them. They have used their evil mind controlling abilities to control our politicians, our generals, and religious leaders. But today that all comes to an end."
The colonel paused for dramatic effect, before firing up a powerpoint presentation. A clip art Ostrich flashed up on the screen.
"Men, I present to you 'Operation Ostrich'. Why is it called that, you ask? Well the success of this operation relies on speed, you see. And Ostriches, well, they run fast. We have to take the enemy by surprise and destroy them in their entirety before they know what has hit them. The plan is simple, at 0500 hours we will board our supersonic submarines and head down into the Mariana Trench, where the Emperor Lobster lives. Each submarine will be armed with neutron bombs, which we will use to completely destroy the evil Crustacean empire. I warn you now...this is a suicide mission, but the sacrifice we make today will be remembered for generations to come. We will die heroes!"
At the conclusion of his rousing speech the Colonels men rose and cheered. He retired to his office to prepare for departure.

He sat at his desk and poured a shot of bourbon. A bit of Dutch courage to help him face what was to come. It was then that he noticed an unopened letter laying beneath a pile of classified documents. 'A letter from an old friend' was scribbled on it. He opened it and began to read:

"My dear friend, how it pains me to hear that you were sent away once more. I know it's not your fault, you have no choice in the matter. You're always off trying to save the world! I hope one day you will return to us.

Yours truly, Alfie"

"Damn civvies..." the colonel said. "They'll never understand the sacrifices we have to make for them. I'm sorry Alfie, you won't be seeing me again."
The Colonel finished his shot of Bourbon and poured another.
"The Crustacean Insurrection must be defeated!" he yelled.
Suddenly the door to his office burst open and a bunch of men in white suits barged in. They were armed with batons and tazers.
"What is the meaning of this?!" Colonel Swordfish yelled.
"How did you get out of your room?" one of them replied sternly. "More importantly, who left the warden's office unlocked?"
"Look, He's been drinking his bourbon!" another fired up.
The colonel was wild eyed and furious.
"HA! Spies sent by the Lobster King eh?!"
"Oh Jesus Christ not the Lobster people again."
The Colonel drew his gun and prepared to defend himself.
"You'll never take me alive Crustacean scum! I'm gonna boil every last one of ya alive and eat you for dinner. HAHAHA!"
The Colonel pointed his gun at the nearest assailant and pulled the trigger. It jammed.
"Damn...busted gun...these god-damn Lobster tricksters must have tampered with it."
"Come now..." one of the men in white suits said. "It's time to take your meds."
The Colonel lunged at him and tackled him to the floor.
"You'll never take me alive!!" he yelled, as he started throwing punches at his head.
"Get him off me! Get him of me!!!"
The rest of the attackers gathered around and began to taze the Colonel. He screamed in pain and fell to the floor.
"Sedate him!"
The Colonel felt a sharp pain in his arm and an icy substance enter his veins. As his vision began to fade, he started sobbing.
"No... I was so close. All my plans are unraveling. Operation Ostrich...the lobster people have won. Humanity is doomed."
Then everything went black.

He awoke in a padded room, strapped to a chair. Before him was a doctor, with a concerned look on his face.
"Where...where am I?" he asked wearily.
"It's okay, you're safe now. Can you tell me your name?"
"My name? Yes...it's...it's Colonel Swordfish...no, wait, that's not it..."
He paused for a long moment, and finally the truth began to hit him.
"My name is David..." he said solemnly.
"Good!" The doctor replied. "Very good. And where are you David?"
"I'm at the mental hospital."
"That is correct." the doctor replied. "You've been skipping your medication, haven't you David."
"Y-yes." David replied, his eyes downcast. The doctor stayed silent and walked over to him. He placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder, then offered him a small white pill.
"This will make you feel better." he said.
David paused for a long time, before finally nodding in resignation, taking the pill and swallowing it.
"Very good David. Very good! Now, let's get you back to your room."

When he was back in his room, the door was locked behind him. He sat on his bed and began to cry. Hours ago he had believed he was about to set off on a secret mission to save the world. Now he was a poor sick man in a mental asylum. He started to lay down to go to sleep when a chirping from the corner of the room startled him. He looked over and saw a canary in a bird cage. Beside the cage was an empty bird feeder. David smiled through his tears.
"Alfie! My best friend. It's good to see you again."
Alfie chirped some more, and David went over to refill his food.
And so he spent the rest of his days in the asylum, never to return to his delusions again.

...

The Emperor of the Lobster people was in his lair beneath the waves. He was relieved... General Swordfish had come very close to ruining his diabolical plans. Now nothing lay in his path. Total victory for the Crustacean Empire was now assured.




Title submitted by: Herm

Three things to be included: Busted handgun, Bird feeder, Letter from an old friend
(submitted by Mal)

Title submitted by: Josh

Three things to be included: Mistaken identity, Divorce, Lighthouse
(submitted by Curtis)

text version

+

Jackie, I’m sure your mother has told you the story before, but as I begin to write you this letter, I couldn’t help reminiscing about the day Rachel and I first met. Weyburn had survived yet another night of endless snowfall, and your mother was unlucky enough to receive an express package of it, shipped and delivered by my shovel. I spent the next fifteen minutes apologizing and promised to make up for it over dinner. We married exactly a year later, on that same street, in that same driveway. I still remember watching as the crowd grew smaller and smaller in the rear view mirror as we drove off, and somehow the memory feels a lifetime away, and as if it were made only yesterday. We’d decided to spend our honeymoon at a defunct lighthouse on the coast of Nova Scotia. I couldn’t sleep the first night, instead following the ceiling fan around and around, entirely lost in thought about all of those people in the rear view mirror. All of them lined up in the street, grinning and clapping, some cheering...each of them more fake than the last. Months of “isn’t this all happening too fast?”, and “they’re too young”, or even “him?!” hung over the wedding like a--well, this is all to say your mother calmed me. She was good like that. Rachel had a way about her, a way about people, that to this day remains hopelessly foreign to me. I still remember the day you entered this world. The rain pounded against the windshield as I carefully followed faint lights through the haze. The traffic was infuriating, and anticipating the condescending lecture I’d get from your grandparents, even more so. “Can’t even show up for his own kid’s birth,” they’d say, “honestly, Rachel, I don’t know what you ever saw in him”. Ever. That single word. The word I was never supposed to hear as I returned home early one evening. The word that, looking back, should have been the largest of several red flags. And yet, I still had the naïveté to go on as if the day would never come where the only things I’d have left of you would be an empty home, an empty crib, and a pile of divorce papers. I still remember the day I found you again. I sat alone in my truck, eyes glued to the rear view mirror for what felt like hours. Watching you laugh, watching you smile...it felt like everything was right for the first time in over a decade. Eventually you stood up, hugged one of the other girls, and swung a bag over your shoulder. I had this flash of panic as I lost track of you in a sea of teenagers. It was in that exact moment that I decided I’d never lose you again. Never. Jackie, you have to understand that I never wanted any of this to happen. I wanted to be there for your birth. I wanted to see you off on your first day of school. I wanted to be the one to teach you how to drive. This is all to say, I wanted to be a part of your life. Your whole life. But there were always these obstacles. Obstacles that needed to be taken out of the equation this time around. Forced overtime, infuriating traffic, your grandparents poisoning your mother against me. Against us. If you’re reading this letter, you’ll probably have heard things about me. Things that may shock you. You have to understand, Jackie, these things had to happen for the three of us to be together again. Me, you, and your mother. The way it was always supposed to be. And as I sit here in my truck watching as they cuff your step-father in my rear view mirror, the way I know it will be. If you're reading this letter, know I did all of this for you. If my plan worked, you never will. I’m really looking forward to meeting you. Lots of love, Dad

That's all I've got for you. Enjoy. If I get the others, I'll post 'em when I get 'em.

I can't wait to read these stories.

Looking forward to read Wikey's story in particular.

Just read Herm's...

Spoiler	+
xyla phone lol I love a good pun. This story was wild I was wondering where it was going to go and then boom crazy town. Very nice

Christian

Spoiler	+
oh alright a murder mystery with a bug pov? I quite enjoyed this one. This one... Sparks joy.

Malion 🔧 @ 18/11/2020 2:37

Just read Herm's... Spoiler + xyla phone lol I love a good pun. This story was wild I was wondering where it was going to go and then boom crazy town. Very nice

Spoiler	+
Funny thing is, the pun wasn't intentional. Maybe it was subconscious lol.