Curtis @ 4/11/2014 1:49

STORY TIME. Gather around kiddies! So Saturday night at work I was covering the seafood department. A customer came up, I got him his salmon SHIT, and I chatted with him for a minute etc. The guy was leaving and told me I had great customer service and was very friendly (DAMN STRAIGHT!!) and then he walked away Then he came back half a second later and was like, "Hey, I know this might be a bit odd but I've got a card if you wanna take it.." So I was like wat and took his card. "Boston Church of Christ". :| . I figured he was just a Jehovah's witness type person/whatever. Just someone trying to recruit whoever He told me that they had a men's group age 21-49 or some shit, and that they were gathering tomorrow (sunday) for apple picking and drinking cider and being MERRY! He asked me if I went to church regularly (no) and wanted to come join (NO!) I told him I'd think about it and pretended to seem interested. Then he handed me a different card with random scripture shit printed on it and then asked if we could exchange phone numbers. I made sure to take his phone number so I wouldn't have to give mine. I told him I couldn't go to the apple picking thing tomorrow because I was working. He shook my hand and said he hoped he'd hear from me and then walked away THAT'S WHEN MY TROUBLES JUST BEGAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The next day, I was working a very busy sunday over at the deli. In the middle of all the usual deli chaos, I heard "Hey Curtis!!". I turn and it's DAVID!!! The guy He's standing there waving to me with a huge smile on his face. I walked over and was like OH GOD. His two kids were standing next to him and he introduced me to them. They waved at me and smiled right at me with their eyes wide. It was creepy and weird as fuck He had a pencil and a piece of paper in his hand and gave it to me. "I never got YOUR number!". I was like uhhh and wrote down my number but changed one digit. He also printed out another thing of prayers and scriptures and upcoming church events that I could attend. He asked me if I lived in town and asked which street I lived on..... And then he asked me if I wanted to grab coffee sometime or a smoothie. I said "I don't like smoothies". That was my gut reaction, I thought it was so funny afterwards, I forgot I had even said that. After he walked away, I saw him in the produce department staring directly at me from across half the store SO ANYWAY, the seafood guy came up to me later and was like "did you find that guy who was looking for you?". He said the guy and his two creepy kids went up to the seafood department and asked if I was working today, cause I told him the day before that I couldn't go apple picking because I was working. HE CHECKED UP ON ME. He didn't even buy anything. Then the seafood guy was like, "nah he's got the day off" (he thought I did). And creepy David said, "hm..oh.....he lied I guess.." and walked away. This was right before he found me at the deli So now I'm CREEPED OUT MAN! This David freak is following me, he was in today looking for me too. My coworker told me but I had the day off. I'm sure he called that number and realized it wasn't me. YIKES! He doesn't seem like he wants to just recruit anyone he can. He wants to recruit ME! It's very odd. He gives off this very strange, rapey/cultish/suicide cult vibe. My coworkers agree. He has a very unsettling face I'M CONCERNED!

Laughing a lot

Malion @ 4/11/2014 15:48

My teeth have been hurting all day so I finally broke down and took some medicine... I thought the migrane medicine would work but there was only 1 and a half pill left so I took them. TUrns out it's a pretty strong pain pill in the wrong bottle and I was supposed to take like a half of them... so yeah I don't know whats going to happen.

Pls don't die

but shiki, if mal dies, we can finally elope without guilt!

Update I'm OK now and Brian is dead

My cat made that sound once. And then he shrieked and woke the whole house up.

In the town i currently reside, there is a river that runs through the middle and the stupid fucks that built this place like 200 years ago decided to build the town in a flood plain. So a few years back the town flooded extremely bad and it was a pretty big deal, made national news.

So i was at work shortly after the flood and two guys in suits came up to me and tried to convince me that the end times were coming mostly because the town had flooded. I debated the one dude for a good 5 minutes and it was literally like talking to a brick wall.

At the end I was practically shouting at him like "YOU KNOW, LIKE NOWHERE ELSE IN THE WORLD IS FLOODING RIGHT NOW, ITS JUST THIS PLACE. THIS FUCKING PLACE!!!!!
SO HOW CAN THE END TIMES BE COMING JUST BECAUSE THIS SHITTY LITTLE BURGH OF A FEW THOUSAND PEOPLE HAD 1 FLOOD?

And he was like "Have you read the story of Noah son?" Over and over again. Until i finally just walked the fuck away while he was in the middle of a sentence.

FUCK RELIGIOUS PEOPLE

One analogy I head was, "Arguing with a christian is like playing chess with a pigeon. You could win and the bird would still knock down all the pieces and strut around like the victor."

Vic today:
"I have class till 9pm, amazing race leg 3 to run tonight, and a live survivor challenge... I have a busy night!"

#nolife

I'm in an big brother all stars game on IMDB and it was me and this girl who is 50/50 loved/hated by people there it seems on the block and I verbally abused everyone demanding votes be in as quick as possible so I could get on to more important business while insulting the hell out of the girl and how I hope she can stay in the game since it's all she has in life and she acts pretty high and mighty like it's a done deal that I'm going home by my own doing. She gets in arguments with half the cast somehow during all of this so it's a real toss up despite me trying every play in the book to ensure I'm voted out, though still sort of hoping I live to see another day because how funny would that be? She wishes me luck and the votes are revealed.

She got evicted.

I should note this girl basically orchestrated it so that me and my "peeps" could all get eliminated in a survivor game a while back because she was mad that we were doing well and winning games and had eliminated all of the big name people in various games. We called her group the tengaged alliance and they only joined this game that we had joined so that they could eliminate us and put us in our place. This was many, many months ago, maybe last year.

So this was definitely a slow burn.

This thread is getting good.

I almost got jumped yesterday. Some black dude. But I got away!

Vernon of 2014 @ 4/11/2014 23:20

I almost got jumped yesterday. Some black dude.

One person? Jumped?

So I was looking at the user list at the bottom and for some reason it looked familiar.



Like I wasn't sure why, it was just probing my subconscious looking at the colour combination.
Then it hit me.

Spoiler	+

Tim @ 5/11/2014 6:22

Vernon of 2014 @ 4/11/2014 23:20 I almost got jumped yesterday. Some black dude. One person? Jumped?

Some racist motherfucker in overalls jumped out of nowhere and almost landed on him.