Sometimes I catch myself moving like Raven Symone in the Cosby Show credits

While waiting at the bus stop, I got to watch somebody get arrested today.

Slow news day

STORY TIME. Gather around kiddies!

So Saturday night at work I was covering the seafood department. A customer came up, I got him his salmon SHIT, and I chatted with him for a minute etc. The guy was leaving and told me I had great customer service and was very friendly (DAMN STRAIGHT!!) and then he walked away

Then he came back half a second later and was like, "Hey, I know this might be a bit odd but I've got a card if you wanna take it.."

So I was like wat and took his card. "Boston Church of Christ". :| . I figured he was just a Jehovah's witness type person/whatever. Just someone trying to recruit whoever

He told me that they had a men's group age 21-49 or some shit, and that they were gathering tomorrow (sunday) for apple picking and drinking cider and being MERRY! He asked me if I went to church regularly (no) and wanted to come join (NO!)

I told him I'd think about it and pretended to seem interested. Then he handed me a different card with random scripture shit printed on it and then asked if we could exchange phone numbers. I made sure to take his phone number so I wouldn't have to give mine. I told him I couldn't go to the apple picking thing tomorrow because I was working. He shook my hand and said he hoped he'd hear from me and then walked away

THAT'S WHEN MY TROUBLES JUST BEGAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The next day, I was working a very busy sunday over at the deli. In the middle of all the usual deli chaos, I heard "Hey Curtis!!". I turn and it's DAVID!!! The guy

He's standing there waving to me with a huge smile on his face. I walked over and was like OH GOD. His two kids were standing next to him and he introduced me to them. They waved at me and smiled right at me with their eyes wide. It was creepy and weird as fuck

He had a pencil and a piece of paper in his hand and gave it to me. "I never got YOUR number!". I was like uhhh and wrote down my number but changed one digit. He also printed out another thing of prayers and scriptures and upcoming church events that I could attend. He asked me if I lived in town and asked which street I lived on..... And then he asked me if I wanted to grab coffee sometime or a smoothie. I said "I don't like smoothies". That was my gut reaction, I thought it was so funny afterwards, I forgot I had even said that. After he walked away, I saw him in the produce department staring directly at me from across half the store

SO ANYWAY, the seafood guy came up to me later and was like "did you find that guy who was looking for you?". He said the guy and his two creepy kids went up to the seafood department and asked if I was working today, cause I told him the day before that I couldn't go apple picking because I was working. HE CHECKED UP ON ME. He didn't even buy anything. Then the seafood guy was like, "nah he's got the day off" (he thought I did). And creepy David said, "hm..oh.....he lied I guess.." and walked away. This was right before he found me at the deli

So now I'm CREEPED OUT MAN! This David freak is following me, he was in today looking for me too. My coworker told me but I had the day off. I'm sure he called that number and realized it wasn't me. YIKES!

He doesn't seem like he wants to just recruit anyone he can. He wants to recruit ME! It's very odd. He gives off this very strange, rapey/cultish/suicide cult vibe. My coworkers agree. He has a very unsettling face

I'M CONCERNED!

He just wants to save your soul!

I did a great job of narrating that.

MY SOUL DOESN'T NEED ANY SAVING!

JJ just read the story out loud on Skype and it was hysterical

Buffy @ 4/11/2014 2:18

I did a great job of narrating that.

I'd love to hear you narrate that.

EDIT: Scratch that, you guys are assholes! I see how things are. Didn't see the post above me. Fucking hell.

You are ginger and he wants to help. Cant blame the guy!

I didn't know you were on Timothy! I don't think we have each other added on there

I am signing on Skype just to finally interview Tim.

I heard my professor say he'd be out of town on Monday and that Wednesday was a reading day where we don't have class, so I didn't go to class today. I looked at the syllabus and apparently I misheard him and there was class today, as well as on wednesday because the reading day isn't until next week. Next Monday is when he'll be out of town. I'm going to be pissed if there was a quiz today because I've gotten an A on all of the others so far.