Today I was walking down a hallway to use the bathroom. One of the doors opens, and this big guy comes walking down the hallway towards me. I notice that he's completely avoiding my gaze, which I guess is socially understandable since he just came out of the bathroom.

Then I get to the door, see the sign, and realize that this dude just came out of the women's room. So I look back, kind of awkwardly, at this dude. I try the men's room door, and it's locked. So I decide to just stand there and wait for a bit, because for some reason it's just way creepier to be the second guy to use the women's restroom.

Then some girl comes up, notices me waiting, and, I kid you not, starts making fun of me for not using the women's room. Then she goes in and uses it. I had no idea what to do now. Presumably she was expecting me to wait around and then go in after she was done, and judging by the bizarre noises coming from the men's room, there was no way I was getting in there any time soon.

So I fled the scene. It seemed like the least awkward thing to do.

What noises from the men's room?

I dunno for sure. It definitely didn't sound like wiping, I know that much.

The fact that you know how to recognize 'wiping' from across a door is creepy.

OH YOU CANT GO IN THERE:::THERE'S A SIGN AT THE DOOR SAYING "WOMENZ ONLY"

lol...boundries. don't let that get in your way man....when you gotta go, you gotta go. it's nature for fuck sake, how dare you let a sign stop you from doing what your body/system tells you to do!?....weak

You had to wait for a bathroom? Welcome to our reality.

And yes, I've used a guys bathroom (more than once) because you all never have a line!

Funny unrelated story. My family is rather conservative and sheltered. We were at a restraint and my sister saw a bathroom titled "unisex" she goes on to blurt out. "Are those bathroom's for gay people".
My parents and I all face palmed. It was p. funny

Today I took a psych test.

1. You are walking in the woods. Who are you walking with?
Rob: My fiancee, Robette.

2. You are walking in the woods. You see an animal. What kind of animal is it?
Rob: It's a dog.

3. What interaction takes place between you and the animal?
Rob: I kick it into the bushes.

4. You walk deeper into the woods. You enter a clearing and before you is your dream house. Describe its size.
Rob: It's Luigi's Mansion, from Luigi's Mansion. So it's pretty big, or at least it was when I tried to make a replica on The Sims.*

5. Is your dream house open, or surrounded by a fence?
Rob: There's no fence. Most haunted houses don't care if you go into them.

6. You enter the house. You walk to the dining area and see the dining room table. Describe what you see on and around the table.
Rob: There's a big fat ghost there eating all of the food, and a few candlesticks on the table, which is mostly laden with waste and dishes. There's a piece of cheese underneath one of the chairs.

7. You exit the house through the back door. Lying in the grass is a cup. What material is the cup made of (ceramic, glass, paper, etc.)?
Rob: Sure, it's ceramic.

8. What do you do with the cup?
Rob: I throw it away. I'm not very thirsty.

9. You walk to the edge of the property, where you find yourself standing at the edge of a body of water. What type of body of water is it ?
Rob: It's a massive lake. I suppose I should have brought the cup with me.

10. How will you cross the water?
Rob: I won't. I just found my dream house, so I'm gonna turn around and go back to it, thank you very much.

I received this analysis:

1. The person who you are walking with is the most important person in your life.

- Sure, fair enough. Robette is, after all, the co-star in the epic comedy that is The Life of Rob.

2. The size of the animal is representative of your perception of the size of your problems.

- It was a pretty small dog, I guess. Given that I'm getting married, have to finish grad school applications, am taking 18 credits and have two jobs, I must not pay very much attention to my problems. Either that or my antidepressants are phenomenal.

3. The severity of the interaction you have with the animal is representative of how you deal with your problems (passive, aggressive).

- I aggressively attack my problems, whether or not they've done anything to deserve it.

4. The size of your dream home is representative of the size of your ambition to resolve your problems.

- Given that I picked a massive house that was designed by someone else, you can take this to mean that I either have massive ambition to solve my problems, or that I have massive ambition for someone else to solve my problems. Apparently I don't care who solves my problems, just so long as they get solved eventually.

5. No fence is indicative of an open personality. People are welcome at all times. The presence of a fence is more indicative of a closed personality. You'd prefer people to not drop by unannounced.

- This is just flat wrong. People are welcome to come into my haunted mansion, but the ghosts will punch them in the face and turn them into paintings, so it's not like me being welcoming is a positive social trait.

6. If your answer did not include food, people, or flowers then you are generally unhappy.

- Well, okay. There was a lot of food, but someone else was eating it. There was also a person (well, three, if you count me and Robette standing there), but he was kind of undead. So the jury's kind of out on this one.

7. The durability of the material with which the cup is made is representative of the perceived durability of your relationship with the person from number 1. For example, Styrofoam, plastic, and paper are disposable; Styrofoam, paper, and glass (ceramics) are not durable; and metal and plastic are durable.

- Whoever wrote this test has never put a plastic cup in a very hot dishwasher, or watched one get run over by an SUV. I've owned a ceramic mug that's been around since before I was born. If that's not durable, I don't know what is.

8. Your disposition of the cup is representative of your attitude toward the person in number 1.

- Apparently I'm just going to throw Robette away when I'm not in the mood for her. That might make things awkward with the in-laws. Good thing this test warned me in advance.

9. The size of the body of water is representative of the size of your sexual desire.

- This test correctly identified that I am male. Well done, the internet.

10. How wet you get in crossing the water is indicative of the relative importance of your sex life.

- According to this test, there's this massive lake of sexual desire in my life that I apparently don't give half a crap about. Then again, I live in Canada, so even if I did cross the lake it'd be, y'know... because it's frozen, so I wouldn't be getting wet then. Apparently intelligence prevents you from having sex, which would certainly explain why it seems like everybody around me is getting dumber with every consecutive generation.

So, there you have it. The most important person in my life is someone to whom I have a breakable relationship, and I will impulsively pick her up and throw her away for being irrelevant, due to my complete ignorance of the massive sexual desire I'm housing. Meanwhile, someone else is eating my undead happiness, but it's only a minor problem, and I'll be able to kick it into the bushes thanks to my colossal ambitions.

Thank goodness for internet psychology.


*It didn't work at all. I finally managed to do a halfway decent replica in Sims 2, but the game refused to let me make children into ghosts like I wanted to. Overall, it was quite disappointing.

Poor Robette. She's going to break into 100 pieces

tragedy :(

On the bright side you'll still have luigi's mansion

You should have posted just the questions here. It would have been interesting to see how people answered. ;) lol

Love the plastic cup in the dishwasher visual. We have lost far more plastic travel mugs than ceramic mugs, prolly because the people know better than to break my favorite Tink mugs :P

Don't feel too bad for Robette, folks. I had her take this test.

Her answers were:

1. Me.
2. A big bear
3. Run away from it
4. A really small house
5. Yes.
6. No people. Just dishes.
7. A disposable plastic cup
8. Throw it away because it's obviously garbage.
9. (I'm not allowed to say what she answered here)
10. (I'm not allowed to say what she answered here)

So, apparently she has massive problems that she'll run away from and will throw me away because I'm obviously garbage.

In other news, today I initiated a passive-aggressive attack against whoever it is that keeps stealing my freakin' table from the school hallway.

My university is one gigantic building. Every part of it except for the lobby shuts down at night. There is one section of the lobby that is perfectly nice and quiet, while the rest of it is filled with obnoxious athletes who pump music while talking about stuff nobody but an athlete could possibly care about. So, I have a table in the quiet area, where I sit and drink iced tea while studying until 2 or 3 in the morning. In fact, on more than one occasion I have sat in that chair literally from sunset to sunrise working on a paper. The table stayed in that spot for like an entire year, and all was well and good at Rob State University.

But for some freakin' reason, this term, people keep stealing my table. I think what happened is that I went away to Oxford, and people went, "Hey, what happened to that guy who always sits at that table? I think he's dead. Let's take his table." Those bastards. Anyway, for the entire term to date, I'd study there at night, then some jerk would take it the next morning, and it would show up at some other random location throughout the school. I kept dutifully moving it back, and whoever it was kept taking it. Then one day they put a sofa next to my table, which encouraged other people to sit there and annoy me while I was trying to work. The next day the table was gone again so I sat on the sofa. Because whoever is doing this has decided I'm not allowed to be happy, they proceeded to steal the sofa too. It is completely gone, and I have no idea where the hell they put it. I also can't find the table, and I actually think that the RSU janitorial staff actually put it in the locked storage room, because I took the time to go through every freakin' hallway in the building, and it is not there.

So today I stole another table from the athletes' section, then went to the library and printed off a note in massive font, which I laminated to the table with packing tape which I jacked from the drama department, because screw you, Rob State University, I'm not only gonna go passive-aggro on your butts, but I'm gonna use your own resources to do it.

It says:

"HEY, I JUST MET YOU
AND THIS IS CRAZY
BUT HERE'S MY TABLE
DON'T MOVE IT, MAYBE?"

I lay you ten to one it's gone tomorrow, and the facilities department leaves a note telling me that my taste in music sucks. I blame you, Jeffrey Fernandis.

Your stories are very entertaining. I didn't know you went to RSU. It was near the top of my list till I heard about these table snatchers.

So I'm sitting at my table, which has magically survived the night, and then some guy from my philosophy class comes up to me and asks if I put the sign on there. And, sure enough, the facilities manager picks that exact moment to walk by. Apparently the school keeps telling him to move the table, because for whatever reason they don't want it in that hallway. Since I've already used up my lifetime allotment of asking the school to let me do things for literally no other reason than I want to do them, I highly doubt that I'm going to be able to launch an appeal.

So now not only are my table privileges revoked, but now the facilities manager knows who I am, and has the ability to come yell at me if I move it again.